Be forewarned, some people have no filters on their brains. For some odd reason their brain thinks of some obnoxious thing to say and there is no little warrior blocking the passageway from the brain to the mouth and it just gets blurted out; inevitably hurting someone's feelings or really pissing them off. This couldn't be more true while you're pregnant.
After you start breaking the news that you're knocked up, everyone and their long lost cousin, six times removed, will have something to say. Now, sometimes it totally works in your favor. There are some lovely angels who have wonderful words of wisdom and advice. Hold on to those angels for dear life because they'll be the ones who bring you down a couple of notches when your inner banshee starts to come out. So far, for me, I have an amazing group of people including my mom, my boss, one of my best friends, my two sister in laws, and of course my kick ass husband, serving as my rocks holding down the sails of craziness so I don't go postal.
Unfortunately, even they can't prevent every little piece of douchebaggery that might fly my way. For example, after spending a weekend laying on the couch because my nausea was so intense it left me immobile, I heard "Lex, do you think that maybe the nausea is just all in your head?" Now, my first reaction was one of pure hatred and violence. I could have gone into a crazy rampage of "You don't know what it's like! You have no idea of what's going on in my body! It's different for everyone! Why don't you jump off a bridge, land on a pile of HIV infected needles, and rot!" I was angry. But instead I just said "No, it's not. Thanks for asking." And walked away.
Wasn't exactly the best way to deal with it. I so badly want to be the type of woman that no matter what stupid things come my way, I can calmly (and almost happily) diffuse them and move on. I would have much preferred to sit this person down and give them a little education of what actually happens during a women's first trimester, and before a single "but that didn't happen to my sister/mother/baby momma" can slip out, inform them of all the stats that explain the various experiences pregnant women can go through. It truly is different for every woman. I would have also liked to encourage this person to ask questions about the experience rather than passing judgment because they don't understand something. Alas, I did not of those things because I just wanted to throw a refrigerator at their head.
With that said, we're not perfect. Sometimes people say stupid things. Sometimes people have stupid reactions to the things that people say to them. Sometimes people overreact (cough cough, me, cough) and that's just life. But as a pregnant woman who is feeling very protective of her own emotions, her loved ones, and the child growing inside of her, its feels like a completely different experience to feel like you're being threatened, even on the most minimal level. Just remember, you have something so wonderful growing inside of you that will put whatever those people have to say to shame. Your child will love you no matter how crazy you are. And if they ever say something you don't like, you can just ground them for life. Ain't life grand. :-)
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